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Good things come to couple that wait

Fourth in a series about married couples who met through the Catholic Church or one of its institutions.

Newlyweds Courtney and Andrew Schmidt have taken every step together, intentionally.

They met in 2016 through the Catholic Campus Ministry at Towson University. Courtney Nellies, then a junior, was the president of the campus ministry student board. Schmidt was president of his campus ministry program at Stevenson University.

“My group was really tiny,” said Andrew, who reached out to other Catholic campus ministries in the Archdiocese of Baltimore. He began corresponding with Courtney, initially about their programs and then getting to know one another.

Courtney had ended one relationship and wasn’t ready to date. She felt called, instead, to a “dating fast,” to focus on her relationship with God and strengthen friendships. Andrew, who had recently ended a relationship, agreed the time was right for them to be friends.

“It was an interesting experience,” Andrew said. “It was good to be with someone who wanted to take time and not just jump into things. We were both, in a sense, waiting together.”

Courtney and Andrew Schmidt pray before a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary during their Aug. 15, 2020 wedding at the Newman Center at Towson University. (Courtesy photo)

“Having the pressure taken off, knowing this is someone I’m very intrigued by, someone I can spend time with and just be myself, made a difference for us,” Courtney said. “I can say I was interested in him from day one, but I can also say he quickly and naturally became my best friend. My life doesn’t feel like my life without Andrew in it.”

Six months after meeting in person, they had their first date, in May 2017. It was not uncommon for their nights out to begin with eucharistic adoration.

She attended Sacred Heart School in Glyndon, and Mount de Sales Academy in Catonsville. Homeschooled, he grew up at Church of the Annunciation in Rosedale and St. Joan of Arc in Aberdeen, where he has sung and helped guide confirmation candidates. She has been a member of the Discovering Christ prayer group at St. Paul’s in Ellicott City.

Romance blossomed, despite living  more than an hour apart. The strength of their friendship helped them meet the challenge of Maryland directives  in the face of COVID-19.

“There was a lot of FaceTiming and talking over the phone,” Courtney said.

When it became apparent that the pandemic could affect their wedding, Andrew stepped up. He called their vendors and crafted a new wedding plan. It would be much simpler and include fewer people, but would still be at Sacred Heart Parish, in the small chapel where Courtney’s parents were married.

They exchanged vows Aug. 15, in front of Father Matthew Buening, director of the Newman Center at Towson University.

“It helped me, and him as well, to live intentionally,” Courtney said of her husband. “People were in masks, but that was the only difference. It was nice to be with our family and to celebrate with them.”

There was a small wedding reception and brief getaway to Luray Caverns in Virginia. Courtney and Andrew are planning a larger vow renewal next year, along with a honeymoon in Bar Harbor, Maine.

“At some point you have to come to the realization that things aren’t going to be what I wanted them to be, but you have to let go to appreciate what you have,” Andrew said. “The crisis made us appreciate a lot more being able to see each other. It made us realize our communication ‘game’ and how important that is. Our relationship is a lot stronger.”

Courtney and Andrew haven’t yet joined a parish, and for now worship at St. Ignatius, Hickory, in Forest Hill.

Know of a Catholic couple that could be featured in the “It’s About Love” series? Send details to mail@CatholicReview.org

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