Deacon Stretmater, father of 11 who ministered at Howard County parish, dies at 101

The word “presence” defined the way Deacon Daniel Stretmater ministered, living a life to evoke Christ’s presence through everything he did in his 101 years of life, including actively serving for a quarter-century at St. Louis in Clarksville.

Deacon Stretmater was also a World War II and Vietnam veteran, a devoted husband, a widower for more than 50 years, a father of 11, a grandfather of 12 and great-grandfather of 10. He died Feb. 21 with his family beside him.

“We were all holding hands around the bed, and holding his hands as we prayed the Our Father,” said his daughter, Jody Robins. “That morning, my sister and I did a rosary by his bedside. I think he could hear it.”

The Washington, D.C. native graduated from The Catholic University of America. He married Helen McCandless, whom he met in college, in 1950. They and their children moved from Washington to the Baltimore area in 1960.

“He loved his wife dearly. Nothing but good things to say about her,” said Robins.

“He never looked at another woman,” his son Stephen Stretmater said.

Becoming a widower in 1972, Deacon suddenly had to raise 11 children by himself while working in the defense industry.

“His life was going to work, going to church and working at the house, trying to keep the kids in line, which was tough with 11 of us,” said Mike Stretmater, his son.

To make it through, prayer became even more central.

“It was always interesting to listen to because it came from his heart,” Stephen said. “It was just amazing to listen to him because everything had so much meaning.”

Sensing a call to serve God’s people through the diaconate, he was ordained in 1977.

Deacon Stretmater led parish prayer groups, served in the tribunal, counseled married couples and ministered to the poor within his many duties.

“Dan just exhibited a relationship with the Lord and a closeness to him,” said Deacon Leo Rudegeair, assistant director of ChristLife.

Monsignor Richard Bozzelli, pastor of St. Bernardine in West Baltimore, served with his friend in the mid-1990s at St. Louis.

“His charism was his presence,” Monsignor Bozzelli said. “He did not like being on a pedestal or being in front of everybody, being the center of attention. He just liked being with people.”

Deacon Larry “Tex” Teixeira, who is now at Resurrection of Our Lord Parish in Laurel, said he was inspired to become a deacon through Deacon Stretmater’s example.

“I told him ‘The reason why is that I like the way you do your ministry,’” he said. “‘You’re down to earth. You’re right there all the time.’”

Deacon Stretmater moved to Colorado in 2011 and kept active until a medical issue in August 2025 led to his medical downturn.

Robins said that she could imagine the scene in heaven when Deacon Stretmater greeted Helen.

“That had to be just a beautiful reunion,” Robins said through tears, “a big embrace.”

A visitation will be held March 13 from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. at Donaldson Funeral Home in Clarksville, followed by a graveside service at St. Louis Cemetery in Clarksville.

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