Catholic Review

Inspiring the Archdiocese of Baltimore

A big birthday


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Catholic Review Filed Under: Commentary, The Domestic Church

When I was growing up, birthdays were a big deal. On your birthday, you were treated like royalty. That night, you got to choose what our mother made for dinner. For my birthday in July, I would often pick a delicious chicken dish my mother made with apricot preserves and her magnificent 1-2-3-4 cake for dessert.

My grandmother would arrive in time for dinner, which made it extra special. After dinner and cake, there were presents to open. If you were lucky, you might get to stay up a little late since you were the birthday boy or girl – and you were just a little older.

I had the added advantage of having my brother’s birthday the next day. Because we had back-to-back celebrations, we loved reminding our siblings that our birthdays were coming well in advance.

Maybe because my birthday came during summer vacation, I don’t remember ever having a birthday party with friends – except one year. I’m not sure where my mother got the idea, but one January she decided to throw me a party for my half-birthday.

My friends came to celebrate me – or half-celebrate me – in a room at Shakey’s (or was it Pappy’s?) Pizza. The waiter served trays of half-pizzas, which we gobbled down. Then I blew out the candles on a half-cake made by my mother.

I might be only half-remembering, but I don’t think anyone brought gifts. The party was just a chance to be together and celebrate life and have a little fun with half-pizzas. It was memorable and enjoyable.

Birthdays have been on my mind as I prepare to turn 50 this July. Every birthday is an occasion, and I always stop to enjoy the day. But here I am arriving at 50, and it feels significant.

Perhaps I should schedule some kind of mid-life crisis or set new goals for my life. But all I really want to do is pause and mark the moment with the people who matter the most to me. I don’t know whether I’ll have a party or just try to get together with the people I love over the summer – or a little of both. But I don’t plan to let this moment pass without acknowledging it.

Life is short, after all. Life is worth celebrating. And life is better because of the many people who laugh and cry with us, listen to us, share their stories and accompany us along the way.

At the same time, of course, our nation is celebrating a big birthday of its own. As a bicentennial baby, I’m curious about the nation’s birthday parties and how they might intersect with my own. And I love that our big days fall during July when it can be a little easier to find the time to mark a special occasion. Bring on the fireworks for the USA and some summer relaxation time for me, and, of course, some cake for both of us – and all the July birthday babies.

Birthdays also might be times to set new goals and wonder what we might want to do in this next chapter. But more importantly, to me, they are a time to think with gratitude about the graces and blessings God has given us – the family and friends he’s brought into our lives, the opportunities he’s offered, the challenges he’s walked with us through and the hope he’s given us for tomorrow.

“We are born to love, we live to love, and we will die to love still more,” St. Joseph Marello said.

Whether you’re looking forward to your birthday or your half-birthday or just some time to yourself, I hope the summer offers you a moment to reflect with joy and gratitude on how God has been present in your life – and the hope he gives you for the future.

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