Catholic Review

Inspiring the Archdiocese of Baltimore

Christmas gifts and memories in the making (7 Quick Takes)


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Catholic Review Filed Under: Blog, Christmas, Commentary, Open Window

What a whirlwind Christmas is every year! When our children were younger, I felt more pressure to make sure Christmas was magical. Celebrating Christmas with teens means this season is still magical, but in a different way.

Traditions change as children age. Our children tend to breeze from stage to stage, and it can be harder for me to let go of a tradition. But I think it’s OK that Christmas looks a little different every year. I try to keep my expectations reasonable and also remember that Christmas is a season and not a day.

I hope your Christmas has been a beautiful one. Here are a few highlights from ours:

~1~

We take the 12 days of Christmas seriously here as a stream of cousins comes to town during the week between Christmas and New Year’s. Sometimes I wonder whether our children know how lucky they are to have cousins who are just their age and who enjoy so many of the same things they do—board games and strategy games and baseball and basketball.

Today our younger son asked one of his cousins if he would go shoot hoops with him in the rain, and he happily said yes. By the time they climbed back into the car, they were drenched and smiling. This will be a memory for them that I could never try to create with forced cookie-baking or tree-decorating or whatever else.

I like wondering how our sons will reminisce about these days.

~2~

One of the big family gifts every Christmas is a calendar of photos of my parents’ grandchildren. Four of us take turns creating it every year. With 20 grandchildren on earth who range from infant to college students, creating the calendar is like weaving a tapestry while wrestling a elephant to the ground.

Next year it will be my turn to make the calendar, and I am already wondering how I will fit it into my life.

But it’s the most extraordinary masterpiece. We all love looking through it, and it will hang in my parents’ kitchen for the whole year.

~3~

This year one of the gifts we gave was bacon. During the pandemic, my sister-in-law Karin introduced us to Dakin Bacon, and we ordered some as a treat. It is delicious, and there’s something fancy and fun and decadent about bacon. We froze it and distributed it to my husband’s relatives on Christmas Eve, figuring they could thaw it and cook it Christmas morning.

Not everyone likes bacon, but everyone we gave it to seemed quite happy to receive it.

~4~

I love making sugar cookies at Christmastime, so I made time to make some this week. We have a rule in this house that if I am going to make any cookies, I also need to make chocolate chip cookies. It’s not a bad rule, and it’s one I am happy to comply with. So, I made chocolate chip cookies, as required, and the next day I rolled out and baked sugar cookies.

You might be able to have Christmas without cookies, but I’d rather not try.

~5~

Our friend Linsey surprised us with a Christmas tree nightlight that we love. Linsey and I had gone to the Festival of Trees together, and while we were there, I was telling her how much John loves those vintage porcelain trees with the little lights all over them.

We don’t exchange gifts with Linsey’s family. Still, she saw the nightlight and got it for us. The day she stopped by our house to drop it off, John happened to be outside and greeted her to accept the package. When he opened it, I knew it would be one of the gifts we would remember from this Christmas.

It is so unique and fun and colorful, and we have it in the perfect spot in our dining room.

We gave Linsey’s family a pound of bacon and some sugar cookies. We don’t exchange, of course. But it was a special year.

~6~

I’ve realized I cannot give experiences. I simply do better to give an actual, tangible gift. Last Christmas I promised my mother a shopping day together as her gift, and I think we finally pulled it off in the fall. It was wonderful when it happened, but I felt guilty for months of scheduling and canceling. I’m not doing that again. This year I gave her a reusable bag and three Mason jars (which she uses to give my son his favorite homemade gravy). We can still aim for a shopping day, but that wasn’t her gift.

Meanwhile, one of John’s gifts to me was a raclette set. I am so excited to try it. That will be a gift and an experience, and one I hope we enjoy again and again.

~7~

My mother called this morning, and my husband picked up the phone. He told me my mother had good news and passed the phone over to me. I couldn’t imagine what it could be.

Then my mother told me that my cousin had gotten married yesterday! She and her husband had a quiet and very personal ceremony with her grandfather, who is a minister, presiding. We knew that she was engaged, but we had not heard more about wedding plans. It is the best news, and I can’t stop smiling.

I was thinking how rare it is to get such wonderful news delivered through a phone call. And yet just a few weeks ago my mother called to let me know my nephew was here. What a beautiful way to close out 2023.

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