• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
Catholic Review

Catholic Review

Inspiring the Archdiocese of Baltimore

Menu
  • Home
  • News
        • Local News
        • World News
        • Vatican News
        • Obituaries
        • Featured Video
        • En Español
        • Sports News
  • Commentary
        • Contributors
          • Bishop Robert Barron
          • George Weigel
          • Question Corner
          • Effie Caldarola
          • John Garvey
          • Father Ed Dougherty, M.M.
          • Guest Commentary
        • CR Columnists
          • Archbishop William E. Lori
          • Rita Buettner
          • Suzanna Molino Singleton
          • Christopher Gunty
          • George Matysek Jr.
          • Paul McMullen
          • Father Joseph Breighner
          • Father Collin Poston
          • Father T. Austin Murphy Jr.
          • Robyn Barberry
          • Hanael Bianchi
          • Amen Columns
  • Entertainment
        • Events
        • Movie & Television Reviews
        • Arts & Culture
        • Books
        • Recipes
  • About Us
        • Contact Us
        • Our History
        • Meet Our Staff
        • Photos to own
        • Books/CDs/Prayer Cards
  • Advertising
  • CR Radio
  • Printing
  • Subscribe

“Do my llama slippers need an Instagram account?” and other pandemic questions

Rita Buettner May 21, 2020
By Rita Buettner
Filed Under: Blog, Commentary, Open Window

The other night I decided to go online and order a pair of llama slippers. They arrived this week. Now my feet are warm, and I never need to leave the house again. It’s a complete victory.

I find myself taking photos of the slippers and texting them to two of my sisters. Yesterday I said to them, “I wonder whether it’s time for the llama slippers to have their own Instagram account.”

And it hit me. That’s one of those questions you don’t think you’ll ever ask yourself until you’re in your third month of quarantine. My llama slippers are practically my mascot for this time in my life.

For the first time in my life, I want slippers because I live in my house. They can be shaped like llamas or corgis or avocados, and I can wear them all day, because most people only see me from the shoulders on up. And they might as well have an Instagram account of their own because most of my social interactions are happening virtually anyway.

Do my llama slippers need an Instagram account? I’m not sure.

But the question made me laugh. And I started thinking about other unexpected questions that only seem to come up when you’ve been living under stay-at-home orders for weeks on end. This is what I’ve come up with:

  • Where is all the toilet paper?
  • Where are all the wipes?
  • How can I be so bad at teaching fractions and decimals?
  • How can I be even worse at teaching English Language Arts homework when I majored in English and have devoted my life to the written word?
  • How did it take a pandemic for me to discover grocery delivery?
  • Where does all the food I buy go?
  • Why is it that when I ask what we need from the store, I listen to the answers and carefully write, “Skittles, Sprite, Seaweed, Yeast,” as if that’s a completely sensible list?
  • Why am I so bad at explaining that Spam and sugar cubes are not an acceptable lunch?
  • How will we ever get out of the house on time again?
  • How will we ever get out of the house?
  • Why do we own cell phones when we don’t go anywhere?
  • Are my children learning anything?
  • Why is it so hard to get children logged onto classes?
  • Why do other people seem to have so much time, and I’ve only watched one total episode of The Crown in nine weeks?
  • Was there always this much wildlife in our backyard?
  • What were screen time limits? Did I ever enforce them?
  • How did it take so long to get to Friday? Wait…it’s not Friday?
  • Why do I own so many shoes? Why do I own shoes at all?
  • Do people need to eat lunch again today?
  • Why are Oreos so good when they are soft and stale?
  • Do the stale Oreos need their own Instagram account?

So many questions. I don’t know the answers. But I do have fuzzy llama slippers. So, life is good.

Print Print

Primary Sidebar

Rita Buettner

Rita Buettner

Rita Buettner is a wife, working mother and author of the Catholic Review's Open Window blog. She and her husband adopted their two sons from China, and Rita often writes about topics concerning adoption, family and faith.

Rita also writes The Domestic Church, a featured column in the Catholic Review. Her writing has been honored by the Catholic Press Association, the Maryland-Delaware-D.C. Press Association and the Associated Church Press.

View all posts from this author

Recent Commentary

Up with the birds

Divine cancel culture

Sacraments and Eastern Catholics/ Marriage open to children

Still answering her calling

Haiku Highlights from Easter (7 Quick Takes)

Recent Local News

Spirit moving: A dozen St. Augustine School students prepare to enter faith

Maryland Knights of Columbus, Cross Catholic Outreach team up to pack 40,000 meals

Maryland legislators increase BOOST funding, pass bills expanding prenatal care grants and giving pandemic relief

Girls develop skills and strength in NDP’s tech program

RADIO INTERVIEW: Spending less and living more

Catholic Review Radio

CatholicReview · Catholic Review Radio

Footer

Our Vision

Catholic Review Media communicates the Gospel and its impact on people’s lives in the Archdiocese of Baltimore and beyond.

Our Mission

Catholic Review Media provides intergenerational communications that inform, teach, inspire and engage Catholics and all of good will in the mission of Christ through diverse forms of media.

Contact

Catholic Review
320 Cathedral Street
Baltimore, MD 21201
443-524-3150
mail@CatholicReview.org

 

Social Media

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Recent

  • Bill introduced to expand Supreme Court to 13 justices
  • Sponsor a gargoyle: New fundraiser launched for Notre Dame in Paris
  • PBS documentary explores creator of ‘The Wonderful Wizard of Oz’
  • Spirit moving: A dozen St. Augustine School students prepare to enter faith
  • Up with the birds
  • Movie Review: ‘Roe v. Wade’
  • Federal appeals court says Ohio can enforce Down syndrome abortion law
  • Maryland Knights of Columbus, Cross Catholic Outreach team up to pack 40,000 meals
  • German legislators consider ending state payments to churches
  • Maryland legislators increase BOOST funding, pass bills expanding prenatal care grants and giving pandemic relief

Search

Membership

Catholic Press Association of the United States and Canada

Maryland-Delaware-DC Press Association

The Associated Church Press

© 2021 CATHOLIC REVIEW MEDIA, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED