Halloween is coming, pandemic gains, and inflatable praying mantises (7 Quick Takes)

~1~

Halloween is creeping closer, and I find myself realizing that our trick-or-treating days are over. The pandemic stole what would have likely been our sons’ last evening of trick-or-treating last year. Now, these boys are going on 12 and 14, and they have moved on from that tradition.

I’m mostly at peace with this change. But I will always cherish those dim evenings when I trailed our little ones in costumes along sidewalks and up and down steps as they gathered bags of candy.

~2~

Fall is not my favorite season, but I do love picking mums and pumpkins for our porch. This year we bought a lovely gray-blue pumpkin. I don’t know why there are so many more varieties of pumpkins now, but I enjoy them.

We’ll also buy some traditional orange pumpkins—the kind that look like they’re designed to transform into a coach for Cinderella. But I always enjoy the different ones, and I think of the book Spookley the Square Pumpkin that our boys used to love when they were much littler.

~3~

At a work meeting this week, my supervisor introduced the concept of post-traumatic growth and invited us to think about what we have learned or gained from the pandemic.

I have been thinking that I was given the gift of more time with my husband and children, though I will never look back on it as a time of movies and puzzles and binge-watching. I will always remember it as one of the busiest times in my life.

But I do like thinking about what I gained—maybe even beyond a talent for making breakfast sandwiches and breeding finches.

~4~

During the pandemic, I have gained some new friendships, especially at work.

For weeks and weeks, I have been trying to find a time to bring lunch to two of the wonderful friends I’ve gotten to know during COVID, my colleagues Julie and Marlena. All we wanted to do was find a day we could sit outside and eat sandwiches together. How hard could that be? We’ve all been busy, though, and we just haven’t been able to find the time.

Finally, finally, finally, we managed to make it happen this week. We even went to a restaurant and had lunch outside! It felt so good to be there together, chatting about a thousand things and just enjoying one another’s company.

Hooray for normalcy and time with friends I hardly ever see in real life even though I talk to them every day.

~5~

A book recommendation: This week, I finally read When Life Gives You Pears by Jeannie Gaffigan, which my sister Treasa gave me back in July. It was a quick read in all the best ways. Jeannie speaks about her faith and her family and the challenges she experienced with honesty and humor. Even though I knew ultimately Jeannie would recover, there were more twists and turns than I expected—and I couldn’t put it down.

~6~

For the first two anniversaries of my brother-in-law Eric’s death, I drove to New York to spend time with my sister Maureen and their children. There happened to be a large, inflatable praying mantis on the lawn of their neighbor’s yard, so we took a picture with it. Somehow, a praying mantis photo became a tradition for that day. I know Eric would appreciate it.

Last year, I didn’t travel because of COVID, but my nieces and nephews FaceTimed with me so my virtual self could be part of a picture. This year, I hadn’t even thought of the praying mantis photo, until I noticed that one of our neighbors had one. Who knew inflatable mantises were a genre? So, I walked over to take a photo during the day.

When I got there, the mantis was not inflated. It was flat and lying weakly on the lawn. I took a selfie anyway because I couldn’t stop laughing about the ridiculousness of wanting a photo with an inflatable praying mantis on this very sad day and finding it totally deflated.

This might be my first 7 Quick Takes to include two selfies. Usually, I don’t post any. It must have been an interesting week.

~7~

When John went to visit his father last weekend, he came home with a few items that we had given to his mother over the years. His dad has been looking through some of her belongings since she passed in December. John brought home a little ceramic heart-shaped box he had found for his mom after a high school trip to England and a purse we selected for her on one of our trips to China.

I sat there looking at the purse, remembering how we looked in the shops for just the right gift—something she would be proud to have, something that would remind her of her grandson’s life before we met him, something that would show her she was on that trip to them in our hearts. I loved picking gifts for so many people in our families, knowing they had been on that journey to parenthood with us. Somehow it feels strange to have the purse back in my hands.

I’ve been thinking about the sadness and sweetness of being given back a gift that you selected for someone—someone who’s now passed on.

Find more quick takes on Kelly’s blog, This Ain’t the Lyceum.

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