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Alisha Weir and Kevin Durand star in a scene from the movie "Abigail." The OSV News classification is O -- morally offensive. The Motion Picture Association rating is R -- restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian. (OSV News photo/Bernard Walsh, Universal)

Movie Review: ‘Abigail’

April 19, 2024
By John Mulderig
OSV News
Filed Under: Movie & Television Reviews

NEW YORK (OSV News) – Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky’s 1877 ballet “Swan Lake” had very negative implications for Soviet leaders since the broadcasting of it, in at least three cases, preceded the announcement of their deaths. The same music proves equally ominous for some of the characters in the comic horror film “Abigail” (Universal).

Alisha Weir is pictured on a poster from the movie “Abigail.” The OSV News classification is O — morally offensive. The Motion Picture Association rating is R — restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian. (OSV News photo/Universal)

This humorous spin on the genre features a clever premise and often witty dialogue. Yet any amusement to be derived from it is drowned in a flood of needless bloodletting.

The plot begins as a typical crime story. A band of kidnappers who, for the sake of anonymity, go by the first names of members of the mid-20th century Rat Pack, set out to snatch the young girl of the title (Alisha Weir), the scion of a vastly wealthy family.

They carry her off to a remote mansion where they calmly await payment of the ransom. What they haven’t bargained for, however, is the fact that — in addition to being an aspiring ballerina — their captive is also a ferocious vampire with superhuman strength.

Our entree into the story comes via the most humane member of the gang (Melissa Barrera), nicknamed Joey after comedian Joey Bishop. Her foil is ruthless ex-cop Frank (Dan Stevens), who takes his moniker, need it be said, from Ol’ Blue Eyes.

As Abigail turns the tables on her abductors, their panicked bewilderment is played for laughs. So, too, are the idiosyncrasies of some of their personalities.

Peter (Kevin Durand) — as in Lawford — the outfit’s muscleman, for instance, is more than a little slow on the uptake while sleazy Dean (Angus Cloud), so dubbed for Dean Martin, imagines himself a smooth ladies man. The primary target of Dean’s unwanted attentions is pert computer hacker Sammy (Kathryn Newton), namesake of Sammy Davis Jr.

There’s a good deal of potential fun to be had in this wild riff on the 1936 movie “Dracula’s Daughter.” Yet, as co-directed by Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett, the mayhem wrought by both sides in the life-or-death struggle is far too graphically depicted while the script, penned by Stephen Shields and Guy Busick, is freighted with constant expletives.

The film contains excessive gory violence, including exploding bodies, repellent images, drug use, about a half-dozen instances each of profanity and milder swearing, pervasive rough and crude language and obscene gestures. The OSV News classification is O — morally offensive. The Motion Picture Association rating is R — restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian.

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