Transfiguration moments for parents

Those moments come when you least expect it.

You look at your child and you realize how much they’re growing and changing.

They’re taller. Stronger. More mature. More compassionate. More insightful.

They’re motivated in a new way, finding new interests, new passions, a new purpose.

They’re growing physically, intellectually, spiritually.

It takes your breath away.

Parenting is not always easy, but it’s always good. It’s always important. I look at our teens and think of the seeds we’ve planted over the years—some of which have taken root and sprouted, some of which may not sprout for years. Some will never take root. That’s fine. As parents, we need to be comfortable with the fact that these young people are their own individuals. We are here to love and teach and guide, but we are not here to create replicas of ourselves.

As we speed through life, though, there continue to be moments when I look at my children and realize just how much they’ve grown and learned. On the Feast of Transfiguration, I’ve been reflecting on the transfiguration moments in my own life, when I look at our children and see God at work within them. Those are the moments where they seem like they are so much greater than the little ones we held in our arms so many years ago. Those are the moments when they shine.

“Lord, it is good that we are here.“

We know life doesn’t stay the same. We know that people change. We all do. When you’re raising little ones, you find that the questions that come so often at bedtime for toddlers and preschoolers become more complex and more pressing. These days, sometimes I need to come back with better, richer answers. Sometimes I need to do more listening than talking. Sometimes—often even—I fall into bed thinking I could have handled that conversation better.

There is always another transfiguration moment, a time I look at our children and realize how they’re changing. And I’ll hope that we’ve prepared them for all that they’ll face in the future.

“But Jesus came and touched them, saying,
‘Rise, and do not be afraid.'”

Do not be afraid. And so I stand in awe, watching them grow, wishing it could all slow down just a little, worrying that maybe I haven’t taught them enough or enough of the right things or given them all that they need.

And I marvel not just at how they’re growing and changing, but how they’re also transfiguring me.

Image taken from Transfiguration by Raphael

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