What Mother Teresa teaches us about love

A reporter once asked Mother Teresa why she and her Sisters spent so much time in prayer. If they prayed less, he suggested, they would have more time to work for the poor, the sick, and the suffering.

But Mother Teresa—now St. Teresa of Kolkata—told him that if the Sisters didn’t take the time to pray, they wouldn’t be able to do their work at all. It was only because of that time in prayer that they were able to do those acts of love, acts of service.

I think of that story sometimes when I take the time to do something for myself that seems to be cutting into my time to be productive. If we don’t feed ourselves physically, spiritually, and emotionally, we will be depleted—and unable to be what we want to be—what we are called to be—for others.

It’s a good message anytime, and especially as we start another school year. The calendar has become a swirl of activities and meetings and events, all competing for our time. Even as our days fill with tasks, no one is sending appointments for “prayer time” or “quiet time” or even “family time.”

But Mother Teresa would remind us that if we don’t make time for God and for what feeds us, we won’t have anything to bring to the other work and activities at hand. After all, she showed us that life isn’t about doing more things, doing greater things. It’s about doing small things with great love—one at a time, for the person nearest to us.

“I am not sure exactly what heaven will be like, but I know that when we die and it comes time for God to judge us, he will not ask, ‘How many good things have you done in your life?’” she said. “Rather he will ask, ‘How much love did you put into what you did?”

How much love.

Love is easy, and love is hard. Not everyone we encounter every day is loveable—whether strangers, acquaintances, or people close to us. And Mother Teresa doesn’t let us off the hook there.

“People are unrealistic, illogical, and self-centered,” Mother Teresa told us. “Love them anyway.”

To be able to love people just as they are, we need to allow ourselves to be spiritually fed. Perhaps we can love others better and more fully by also loving ourselves—and opening ourselves up to the love of God and others in our lives.

Yes, we must love. Yes, we must serve. Yes, we are called to be many things to many people and to give selflessly. But we will have more to give when we allow ourselves to be nurtured, too.

St. Teresa of Kolkata, pray for us. Teach us how to love and to serve others—and leave room for ourselves, too.

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